16 August 2012


This is why they never let me speak at annual functions :

"When I came to college, I didn't know why college was important. It was the next logical step. I worked really hard in my school leaving exams, so that I could study at a good college; but why must I go to college was still unknown. 3 years later, I am still unsure if college is necessary; but I am glad that I went to college.

"For most of us, we have broadly two paths ahead. Some of us will study more so that we can work later and some of us will work a little so that we can study later. But at the end of this business, we'll all be working, married, blessed with children, ungrateful for what we have and cursing that which we don't. But most of all, we'll all be dead. And that fear will drive us crazy, forcing ourselves to question - Have I made it large? Does my life matter?

"And we will measure that by the wealth we have accumulated, the fame of our works, the beauty of our love interests and the power we command. All compared to our dearest school friends, who we haven't spoken to in years, our colleagues who we meet everyday and our relatives who we promise to stand by.

"Yet. None of this will make us happy. We will still continue to be miserable - perhaps lesser, maybe more. But what will make us happy? Many bestselling authors have remarked that happiness lies in doing what you want to do. Fantastic. What is that you want to do? Your heart will guide you. It will be your true calling. You will know.

"Does that help you? Because it sure as hell didn't help me. I believe that you will never know what will make you happy. You see, happiness for most of us is a post-action feeling; so unless the act has happened, we will never know if the act will actually bring happiness. So how can one say that 'this' will bring happiness, when the quantum of happiness will come later. I thought being society post holder will bring me happiness, but in reality it made my life miserable. One will never know.

"Should we stop doing anything at all? No. Bollocks. This is not a dope session. Instead we should stop thinking about happiness altogether. Quit chasing it. We've done so much in our life, are we happy today? Or are we worried about jobs, work, result, entrances and all that. Don't think about it. Just do your role. And that's it. The moment we think of 'this' will give me happiness, we run the risk of disappointment. And since we aren't gods, demi-gods or what have you, and can't control anything, we end up being disappointed. So Lesson # 1 : Fuck Happiness. That is not the goal of your life.

"Before you make me your role model, hold your panties. We all have role models and people to look up to. And we choose the best assortment - Da Vinci, Plato, Gandhi etc. And we dedicate our lives to being like them. Sometimes our role models force us to become like them. Yes, I am talking about our parents. And we find these mysterious common qualities between the role model and ourselves. And boom! It's a cosmic connection. We were meant to be like them.

"And considering we are huge in number, it is very likely that you end up being like them. I won't be surprised. But I won't be surprised either, if someone made themselves like their role model, not thinking about who they could be. Lesson # 2 : Live your own life, bro. Have your own experiences. Don't live someone else's life. For that, you have books and movies.

"But at this point, you should look at me and say -who the hell are you to tell me what to do and what not to do? You sucked up to some teacher and that's why you are giving this speech. Nothing more and nothing less. And that would be the truest thing ever! Don't believe me. Question each word I say. No one has the right to tell you how to lead your life. But that doesn't imply that you do whatever you want. Enquire.

"Before you throw your hats in to the air, think about what college was and what you learnt? Did you learn how to solve problems or did you learn how to solve issues? Did you learn how to interact with people or did you learn how to respect people? Did you think or did you follow? That's my third lesson for you - to constantly think for what you are doing? And is it creating value in anyway.

"Now is when you'll throw stones at me and yell - what the hell are we supposed to do, you idiot! We are not supposed to find happiness, we are not supposed to follow people and we are supposed to question every god damn thing! What does that leave us with?! Nothing. And that is exactly how your life should be. An accumulation of nothing. If you have nothing in your head, that is when you'll lead your life as if it were a new life. Not a life of your parents, not a happiness chase, not a chicken run - but a human experience of this world. Be nothing.

"Don't live your life as a male, as a Hindu, as a graduate or as an employee. Fulfill your duties - but don't become a routine of those duties. Don't become a monument of conditioning. I am doing this because this is how it is done. Don't do it. Try something else. If you were to do this for the first time, how would you do it? Live your life like that. Without any idea of the past. Without any thought of the present. Without any worry of the future. With nothing. 

"And that's all I have to say. Godspeed."

To J. Krishnamurti.

Song : Under Pressure -- Queen feat. David Bowie (This version is awesome!)


Devna said...

Did you write this and Krishnamurti inspired it or he wrote it and inspired you?

Rohan Chawla said...

A bit of both. I read it later and I was like, I can't tell who wrote this - C>Shakespeare or Krishnamurthi?!