The greatest problem of the world..

What is the biggest and most important problem of the world? What is the deepest and most disturbing issue, one that requires immediate action and everyone's attention and effort? But that's a loaded question. The real question should be - can there be a single major problem of the world?

For economists, one would remark that the greatest problem would be that of the current global financial/economic crisis and maybe somewhere about resource allocation and efficiency. After all, money runs the world today.

For geographers, the problem would be that of climate change and the way the earth's complex system is changing. From melting ice caps, to changed current directions and hotter summers and colder winters, in 2050.

For the theological, the problem would be of religious conflict and tensions in the name of God. Be it Jerusalem, Kashmir or the increased hatred towards Islam, religion today is no longer a simple path to God.

For the doctors, the greatest trouble is that of cancer, AIDS and other terrible terrible diseases that plague our home today. Finding a cost efficient and sustainable cure for these evils, and making sure they reach everyone that matters, is their top priority.

For the politicians, the worry is that we no longer participate in the political process. That the citizenry is not involved and no longer bothers to care about who rules them and how they rule. They must be motivated. Somehow.

For the academicians, its a matter of deep concern that there aren't enough schools and places for us to study. We can't read and write, and therefore are unable to think rationally. An education gives you wings.

For the philosophers, the question is more subtle. Are we fulfilling the purpose of life? Loaded question again. Does life have a purpose? Is there life beyond death? Is suicide okay? All these problems are relevant only if life is relevant. Must find the relevance of life.

For the activists, the problem is of equality and justice. That men and women, homos and hetros, human and animals, animals and plants, black and white etc. should all be treated equally. Not just physically, but in movies, in literature, in posters, in cartoons and all manifestations of this world.

For the minimalists, the problem is of food and water. That not all of us get enough good quality food and even when we do, there isn't good enough water to digest it. We must do something about these brothers and sisters of ours. Some Ghana Coco and Brazilian Soya?

For the douchebags, the problem is that we have so many problems that we are unable to resolve. Must be such a shock to know.

So, we now have a bunch of problems. How do we know which one of them is the single greatest? What yardstick should we judge them by? What characteristics would the single greatest problem of the world have? If and when it is solved, it should bring maximum relief. But what kind of maximum relief? Quantitative or Qualitative? Or a Weighted relief? Maybe, it should also have an element of urgency. So our factors are Time, Reach and Utility. Anything else?

No, the greatest problem is not that we cannot find the greatest problem.

That done. Think of the greatest problem of the world and measure it by those three factors. And see if you can find a single great problem of the world.

I am still thinking.  

Hermits

This floor of the building was unknown to him and so he tread very carefully. It was somewhat dark, or even if there was light, everything seemed fuzzy. He felt a great sense of uneasiness, a feeling that he shouldn't move forward. But he also felt that he wasn't in control; that it wasn't him who was walking, but someone else. Yet he was the one who felt the movement. And suddenly he felt as if he was falling down a flight of stairs or perhaps falling off a floor or maybe just a great fall down a rabbit hole.

But he had made no such fall. He woke up with a sign of disgust and annoyance. He said to himself - "Yaar, yeh wali feeling kyun hoti hai? (why does this happen?)" He knew he wasn't the only one in the world experiencing it. People dream of worse things - dinosaurs, terrorists and what have you. But this free fall gave him a really bad headache; one that wouldn't let him sleep any further. He hated this feeling.

He drudgingly woke up and did his morning business. What a crappy start. He ate his breakfast, charged his electric devices, packed his lunch and blah and blah and blah. While he was walking to the nearest bus stop to catch a bus (duh!), he put on his earphones and started listening to the music on his music player. Then he said to himself, maybe I should listen to the radio today. The radio is full of surprises and you never know what's coming your way. But the quality and choice is much better on the music player.

And while this was going on, he thought to himself - Hey! Am I talking to myself? Is my mouth opening and closing and my face animating or is all this music business in my head? Are people thinking that I am talking to myself? Although, all this talk about talking to himself was definitely in his head. Actually, that's what pissed him off most - whenever he tried to figure out if he talked to himself, his mind would trick him and make sure everything henceforth was in his mind. Damn it! No way to ever find out. He eventually selected the radio.

And while he waited for the bus, he felt a weird sensation down there. Droplets of toxic waste were hinting their arrival. He found it prudent to take a piss before he boarded the bus. So he walked to the nearest public toilet. He stood in front of the urinal, looked down (Mens' Loo Golden Rule : You don't look at mine, I don't look at yours. We are not interested) and there was nothing. No toxic waste, no droplets and certainly no piss. He prayed to God, made the shhhhh sound and applied all his mental energy, but nothing came out.

He then came out, only to see that his bus had left.

And then he actually said to himself, "Koi naa. Bus hi toh thi. Sussu nikal jata toh!"

He smiled and carried on with his day.


To Apurv Sathe. Bruh-der!

Song : Iss Dil Ka Kya Karoon -- Burfi 

P.S. : This is just the morning. Your (and my) life has many more of these ridiculous, annoying and 'I will not share with others' moments. Don't deny them. Don't discard them. Enjoy! There is so much beauty and fun in all of us. And in everything we do. Mazze karo!

Like me, over here :

Godspeed

This is why they never let me speak at annual functions :

"When I came to college, I didn't know why college was important. It was the next logical step. I worked really hard in my school leaving exams, so that I could study at a good college; but why must I go to college was still unknown. 3 years later, I am still unsure if college is necessary; but I am glad that I went to college.

"For most of us, we have broadly two paths ahead. Some of us will study more so that we can work later and some of us will work a little so that we can study later. But at the end of this business, we'll all be working, married, blessed with children, ungrateful for what we have and cursing that which we don't. But most of all, we'll all be dead. And that fear will drive us crazy, forcing ourselves to question - Have I made it large? Does my life matter?

"And we will measure that by the wealth we have accumulated, the fame of our works, the beauty of our love interests and the power we command. All compared to our dearest school friends, who we haven't spoken to in years, our colleagues who we meet everyday and our relatives who we promise to stand by.

"Yet. None of this will make us happy. We will still continue to be miserable - perhaps lesser, maybe more. But what will make us happy? Many bestselling authors have remarked that happiness lies in doing what you want to do. Fantastic. What is that you want to do? Your heart will guide you. It will be your true calling. You will know.

"Does that help you? Because it sure as hell didn't help me. I believe that you will never know what will make you happy. You see, happiness for most of us is a post-action feeling; so unless the act has happened, we will never know if the act will actually bring happiness. So how can one say that 'this' will bring happiness, when the quantum of happiness will come later. I thought being society post holder will bring me happiness, but in reality it made my life miserable. One will never know.

"Should we stop doing anything at all? No. Bollocks. This is not a dope session. Instead we should stop thinking about happiness altogether. Quit chasing it. We've done so much in our life, are we happy today? Or are we worried about jobs, work, result, entrances and all that. Don't think about it. Just do your role. And that's it. The moment we think of 'this' will give me happiness, we run the risk of disappointment. And since we aren't gods, demi-gods or what have you, and can't control anything, we end up being disappointed. So Lesson # 1 : Fuck Happiness. That is not the goal of your life.

"Before you make me your role model, hold your panties. We all have role models and people to look up to. And we choose the best assortment - Da Vinci, Plato, Gandhi etc. And we dedicate our lives to being like them. Sometimes our role models force us to become like them. Yes, I am talking about our parents. And we find these mysterious common qualities between the role model and ourselves. And boom! It's a cosmic connection. We were meant to be like them.

"And considering we are huge in number, it is very likely that you end up being like them. I won't be surprised. But I won't be surprised either, if someone made themselves like their role model, not thinking about who they could be. Lesson # 2 : Live your own life, bro. Have your own experiences. Don't live someone else's life. For that, you have books and movies.

"But at this point, you should look at me and say -who the hell are you to tell me what to do and what not to do? You sucked up to some teacher and that's why you are giving this speech. Nothing more and nothing less. And that would be the truest thing ever! Don't believe me. Question each word I say. No one has the right to tell you how to lead your life. But that doesn't imply that you do whatever you want. Enquire.

"Before you throw your hats in to the air, think about what college was and what you learnt? Did you learn how to solve problems or did you learn how to solve issues? Did you learn how to interact with people or did you learn how to respect people? Did you think or did you follow? That's my third lesson for you - to constantly think for what you are doing? And is it creating value in anyway.

"Now is when you'll throw stones at me and yell - what the hell are we supposed to do, you idiot! We are not supposed to find happiness, we are not supposed to follow people and we are supposed to question every god damn thing! What does that leave us with?! Nothing. And that is exactly how your life should be. An accumulation of nothing. If you have nothing in your head, that is when you'll lead your life as if it were a new life. Not a life of your parents, not a happiness chase, not a chicken run - but a human experience of this world. Be nothing.

"Don't live your life as a male, as a Hindu, as a graduate or as an employee. Fulfill your duties - but don't become a routine of those duties. Don't become a monument of conditioning. I am doing this because this is how it is done. Don't do it. Try something else. If you were to do this for the first time, how would you do it? Live your life like that. Without any idea of the past. Without any thought of the present. Without any worry of the future. With nothing. 

"And that's all I have to say. Godspeed."

To J. Krishnamurti.

Song : Under Pressure -- Queen feat. David Bowie (This version is awesome!)